Mothers Pass Down Pearls of Wisdom (and Pearl Earrings)
words by Aliza Susatijo, art by Mariam Seshan
Just as all other aspects of life are cyclical, so too is fashion. The 20-year trend cycle draws on the idea that fashion trends have a life cycle of 20 years. From its origin, a trend will last for a certain amount of years before dying out and being considered ‘tacky’ or ‘out of style,’ subjected to the back of closets or donation bins. It will slip from people’s minds, an embarrassing phase of their youth, and be erased for the next decade. Then, it will slowly reemerge over the next few years, brought about early by true trendsetters before taking root in the majority. The trend will run its course once more before fading to obscurity as it awaits its next revival. Thus, the 20-year cycle is complete and remains true throughout history.
Retromania, Simon Reynold’s 2010 thought-piece on the rise to power of “retro” culture, describes 2000’s pop culture as “dominated by the re- prefix: reissues, remakes, and re-enactments.” However, with the rise of the internet and society’s unfettered access to social media in recent times, the very idea of “return” has become less linear. ‘Microtrends’ come and go in the span of six months while its remnants remain on the Internet for eternity. Different eras, from regency to pop punk, are reimagined in the eyes of 16-year-olds. The question, then, is if humanity must resign itself to accept the unfettered flow of consumption as we cycle through trends at the speed of light, or else grasp at the trickling ebbs of a dying 20-year cycle.
“Yet our youth was undeniably influenced by those closest to us. We relied on their experience as we slowly built our own, sending pictures from fitting rooms or sheepishly pulling on a sweater in the aisles of a Hollister at their behest.”
The answer lies in the singular cycle that can't be washed away in a jumble of ages and trends: the life cycle. While the Internet can seem to swallow our whole lives, we do not only draw inspiration from online. There is a sense of external and parasocial pressure when it comes to the Internet. We absorb so many different opinions from online, letting strangers dictate our personal life. Yet our youth was undeniably influenced by those closest to us. We relied on their experience as we slowly built our own, sending pictures from fitting rooms or sheepishly pulling on a sweater in the aisles of a Hollister at their behest. A major part of the recurrence of trends is the tradition of passing down clothes. It is embedded into society, even seen in the custom of wearing “something old” for wedding brides.
I have turned away from the eternally rotating nature of fast fashion and toward perhaps the origin of my life cycle: my mother’s closet. I have no doubt that nothing is more comfortable than a parent’s well-worn hoodie. It is always the perfect thickness, with all the coziness of being run through the washing machine for the past 10 years. Beyond the physical, however, there is care and comfort worked into each thread. Parents pass down their prized possessions with trust in their children to fill them with new life. There is knowledge embedded into the cloth alongside the hours of wear. Decades of experiences in each piece of clothing, from first dates to first children.
“Each piece of clothing [from my mom’s closet] comes with years of history and a peek into my mom’s life, a life I was not yet around to witness.”
My mom is a clean freak, a trait that she and I share. This means that all of her clothes, whether they’re 3 months old or 30 years old (something she loves to point out with the classic “this is older than you are!”), are in top-notch condition. This also means that from the time I was 14, I was inheriting cardigans, jeans, and dresses that had stood the test of time. Clothes from multiple life cycles that prove themselves invulnerable to the whims of fleeting trends. Perhaps not the peak of fashion, they are items that are worn day in and day out. Clothing that transcends the very existence of trends. Universal cuts and sizes, created to be pulled on without a second thought. These are the clothes that carry us through life and make us feel comfortable in our own skin.
Of course, at that age I didn’t appreciate what I had gained, too obsessed with the magazine ads for American Eagle. It is only now, at the age of 20 myself, that I have delved deeper into my mother’s closet. Partly because I’m a penny-pinching college student, but even more so because each piece of clothing comes with years of history and a peek into my mom’s life, a life I was not yet around to witness. I am gifted a story from her college days or from trips she had taken with each item I pull from her drawers. My knowledge of her life becomes one size M sweater larger when her clothes become mine. But I do not have all the knowledge of my mom, so I will find oil stains on her nice blouses or spill my coffee on her stark white linen skirt. Yet this too brings new kernels of wisdom, as she teaches me the 2:1 ratio of laundry detergent and baking soda that can get out even the oldest oil stains (this is real you can try it).
“The most important idea passed on by my mother is that a replication of a trend will never be entirely you. ”
Some of these stories and nuggets of advice are memories that have drifted to the very bottom of my mother’s mind, tales of her youth that were eventually replaced with the stresses of motherhood. In the timeless space of her closet, we get to reminisce together. We learn more about each other’s lives and tighten our bond. As I try on my mom’s clothes, I have a physical piece of her with me, conveying all the love and hope that we don’t always say out loud. So I will always wear her low-waisted bootcut jeans (even if I have to wear a belt so they don’t hit my ankles) and I will learn how to not destroy every white thing I own. Every item from my mother’s closet takes on new life in my possession, revitalized by a 21st-century girl in her 20s.
The most important idea passed on by my mother is that a replication of a trend will never be entirely you. This is the core of having an intentional closet, each piece of clothing containing meaning beyond a trend that will be swept away with the tide of influencers promoting the newest fads. As I lose my desire to be perfectly ‘trendy,’ I find myself picking the same knit sweater out of my closet. And so the whirl of trend cycles are subverted by a single truth: the clothes we are drawn to most often are not the ones you will see on an Instagram feed. We are drawn most often to the clothes that pass down wisdom in their sleeves and carry history in every stitch. The clothes that enrobe you in their familiarity whilst shielding you from the external pressures of the Internet as it begs you to ‘buy it before it's gone!’ With each return to my mother’s closet, I collect layers of knowledge that I hope to carry into the future as I imbue old clothes with all the wisdom a 20-year-old could possibly have.
