MicroInfluencer Apologizes After Advertising Mascara Made From Rheumatoid Arthritis Treatment Drug — Video Script
art by Yi Cheng, writing by Megana Kumar
Wear relatable clothing—hoodie (stains preferable) and sweatpants. Minimal makeup, messy table, wrinkled laundry in back. Film on balcony to connect with nature, but tilt AWAY from the ocean view. Film on first story, do not point towards stairs. Targeting #middleclasscore.
Tone: sad. Hey guys. It’s me, [insert first name here]. I’m here to—
[Camera cuts]
Red eyes, waterworks have started. Sad piano music (copyright free) has started playing. Wow. This was harder than I was expecting. I can’t believe I let you guys down like that. My job as a makeup influencer is so important. I was put on this Earth to make sure you guys get the best products. The best reviews. The best things to make your inner baddie glow. And causing people's joints to be permanently screwed for the rest of their lives—that isn’t making any baddies glow.
[Ad break]
Tone: edging into crying, up the vocal fry. I just want to let you guys know that this isn’t me. My mom’s second cousin’s dog’s babysitter’s niece has rheumatoid arthritis, so I know what it’s like. And just know that if you’re feeling affected by this, I’m— Cue the waterworks. Oh my god, I can’t believe— really pump it up. Niagara falls should be jealous at this point.
[Camera shakes, close it.]
During the time of filming this video, my mom was going through a serious injury and we needed the cash— so I scooped up the first sponsorship I could find to provide for our family. [Cut to pictures of mom on the hospital bed, edit some more shadows under her eyes.] Her wisdom tooth removal depended on this. Her life depended on this. And I’m sorry for how that affected you all.
I’m so, so sorry guys. I just— I just think this is a good opportunity to remember that everyone is human. And people make mistakes. Sometimes, those mistakes can lead to your eyelashes clumping together (pick up the BaddieGlow™ eyelash separator that was laying on the desk and wave it around before throwing it out of frame. Be careless with it, but careful enough to show the brand name.) And sometimes those mistakes can lead to a national shortage of a life saving medical treatment. And to be totally honest and transparent with you guys, I can’t say I won’t make a mistake like this in the future.
[More reflective staring out window, cuddle with dog a little bit because animals are cute.]
I think— I think we all have something to learn from this whole situation. I advertised it, but people were sweeping this stuff off the shelves without even checking what was inside. Responsible consumption is so important in today’s world (fiddle with hands here, make sure to show BaddieGlow™ press ons.) and we all need to grow from this lapse of judgment.
I will be taking a break from social media to help my mother on her road to recovery and reflect more on my actions. Thank you for the opportunities you’ve given me, and it’ll only go up from here.
—
Social Media Break: 2-5 days, come back with this announcement:
During this trying time, I am beyond thankful to my parents, my mom’s teeth, my dog, and my sponsors for supporting me through this process. And this Thanksgiving season, you can be beyond thankful too. With BaddieGlow™’s new mascara you can (I’m being real this time) make your inner baddie glow. While it is rheumatoid arthritis drug free, it does have another deadly ingredient— (pause for dramatic effect) pumpkin spice! Visit BaddieGlow™ Makeup online to find out more and really make your inner baddie GLOW!
